Block upon block

November 13th, 2013 by

We’re all scared of the dark. Everyone, except say Fox. Night-eyes, you see. Foxes can see in the night. Can they see all that scary stuff that comes out? I’d say no. They’d stay indoors, otherwise. Skeletons with archery skills? No thank you.

But then, these scaries only come out at night. During the daytime, it’s all flowers and honky cows. Not like down there. Not like underground, where the sun never shines.

I’m trying to talk about Minecraft. Maybe you’ve played it for 15 minutes. Maybe you haven’t. Some think it’s about building stuff. Making shit. Like a 3D version of MS-Paint.

These people are so totally wrong. Minecraft is a HORROR-EXPERIENCE. I have never shat myself in a game quite like I’ve shat myself playing Minecraft.

Blocky graphics be damned. Fear doesn’t care if you’ve got 2056*2056 textures. If it were realistic, then maybe I would hang up my shovel and say, ‘that’s enough diamonds for me’.

But you can’t get enough diamonds. You’ve got to dig deeper. You have to explore the depths. You have to scream like a little girl. Then – then you might be playing Minecraft.

As entertaining as this video is, it should be pointed out it focuses mostly on how Minecraft changed the games industry and is all about building stuff and blah-de-bah.

Whilst all that may be true, trust me: Minecraft is all about crapping yourself.

Enjoy the video, then talk about changing your pants here. If you seem clean-to-go, go find the BF server here and reverse that situation.

 

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